4 Tips to Help You Maintain During An Uncomfortable Transition Terri Lomax September 9, 2014 10 Comments “Transition is the natural process of disorientation and reorientation that marks the turning points in the path of growth…transitions are key times in the natural process of self-renewal.” -William Bridges About 2 months ago I decided to quit my (very secure and well paying) job because I was downright miserable. I wasn’t passionate about the work I was doing and I desperately needed a way out. Work began to dictate my life in and out of the office. I needed a change that would allow me to spend more time focusing on what I love; speaking to youth about overcoming adversity and helping women become their best selves. Long story short, my fiance and I packed up my things and I moved from New York back to Maryland. During my transition one of my mentors offered me the opportunity to work with him when he had upcoming projects. In the meantime, ya girl was searching for a day job that could pay the bills as I grew my business. Being officially jobless left me with a lot of downtime. Over these past two months I’ve been able to reflect on my life and what’s important to me. Sitting at home with 2 degrees, a list of credentials and an impactful blog with barely enough money to pay the bills, is pretty damn depressing. But, it’s also extremely humbling. It allowed me to see life a little bit clearer. There were some days when I questioned my worth. I didn’t leave the house or post too much online because I didn’t want people to know what position I was in. In my heart I felt that I made the right decision but the light at the end of the tunnel was barely visibly. I felt like a failure. I’m the girl who always has a plan. I always have life mapped out 5 steps ahead of where I am but recently I found myself questioning everything. Am I on the right path? Should I have waited to move? What if I don’t find a job? and the questions went on and on. Once I reconnected with some friends in the area I realized how to make the most of my unique transition. Hopefully some of the tips below can help you as you transition on your path in life. 1. Get Out That House! If you’re anything like me, it’s habit for you to cut yourself off from the world when things aren’t rosy. You may stop posting on social media or stay cooped up in the house wallowing in your predicament. If this is you… stop it! I’m an introvert and I enjoy solitude but I’ve found that depression thrives on isolation. Get out the house and enjoy some free activities in your area. Visit a coffee shop and take advantage of the free Wi-Fi. Take a walk and admire the beauty that nature holds. Curl up in a corner at a local book store and get some free inspiration from the self-help section. Even better, volunteer your time at a non profit or a soup kitchen. I’m telling you, once you get out and start mingling with others, your spirit will be renewed. 2. Find a Support System and Touch Base Often My family moved around a lot when I was younger. I guess I caught the travel bug because I’ve lived in 5 different cities over the past 7 years. Moving around a lot has it’s pros and cons. I’ve been able to gain more confidence in myself and a greater sense of independence with my frequent moving, but I’ve also struggled to find “my place” in the new communities that I’ve relocated to. Keeping in touch with my support system, whether it be via FaceTime, phone or social media, has played a tremendous role in my successful transition into new territory. Touching base with your support system can give you the extra boost that you need as you transition. If you need to find a support system see number 3 for ideas! 3. Find a Source of Consistent Inspiration and Restore Often I was raised in the church. My family and I went every Sunday and occasionally we stopped in for Wednesday Bible Studies. When I started graduate school I fell off and stopped attending church as frequently. Funny thing is, I noticed a significant shift in my life. I wasn’t my usual self. Something was missing. I had cut off a significant source of motivation and hope for myself and this change affected my moods, my mental state and my outlook on life. Recently I’ve made a conscious decision to start attending church regularly and it does wonders for my soul. Church is my thing. The fellowship, the sermons, the praise and worship, it really does something for my spirit. Church may not be your thing and I respect that. There are other great sources of inspiration that can be explored. Just to name a few, there are support groups, clubs (Toastmasters is one of my favorites), local meet ups, online support communities and a host of other motivational resources. Google is my best friend. Look up a source that fits your needs! 4. Remember that Your Current Situation Doesn’t Define You I’m a huge fan of quotes. I just love them. They inspire me. They excite me. And sometimes a simple quote can give me the boost of motivation that I need when I’m feeling low. A new quote that has been inducted into my list of “favorites” is, ” Don’t confuse who you are, with where you are on your journey.” BAM, no explanation needed. So, whether you’re finishing up school and it’s taking a bit longer than you expected, or you’re in the market for work but can’t seem to find the right opportunity. Keep in mind that people often fail to remember those who started the race, they remember those who finish. If you’re still pressing and you haven’t given up yet, you are still in the running to achieve your dreams and goals. Hang in there. It took Thomas Edison over 1000 tries to invent the light bulb 😉 Share Your Wisdom. Comment Below! Did this post inspire you? If so, what message resonated with you the most? What resources or helpful mantras get you through uncomfortable transitions?