It’s such a great time to be alive! We’ve come so far as a people that in today’s world, even our wildest dreams are possible. The sky is no longer the limit, for there are not limits to what we can achieve! But what do you think is the #1 secret for attaining those dreams? 

It’s Sunday night and I’m bundled up on my couch with the Oscar’s on mute. I have a glass of water and a bowl of fruit on my end table and blogging/speaking paperwork scattered all over my couch. I had a great weekend with one of my home girls and now I’m decompressing and prepping for my week. I’m pretty sure most people know by now that Lupita Nyong’o, the Kenyan actress and director, won an Oscar tonight. She gave a short, simple, but very powerful speech. She concluded her acceptance speech with a profound quote: 

“No matter where you’re from, your dreams are valid.”

This made me think back to a conversation that my home girl and I had this weekend. We had enough girl talk to last us about a month and in the midst of our discourse, we exchanged life stories. We talked about the mistakes we’ve made, the life altering experiences that make us who we are and most importantly, where we came from. There were a few times in my life when my family was homeless and those were some of the lowest points for my family and I. Despite our circumstances, we attended church on the regular and gave (either of our time, talents or finances) faithfully. My pastor used to always say “What you make happen for someone else, God will make happen for you.”

After hearing this saying so often and witnessing others reap the benefits of this, I had to test it out for myself. Prior to gaining this insight I had good reason to believe that we lived in a “dog eat dog world.” Everyone seemed to be out for themselves and instead of sharing resources and guidance, people would hoard information just to stay one step ahead of their neighbor. I found this to be true especially amongst women of color. Honestly, I was one of those young women who kept things to myself to hold others back. Nevertheless, I internalized my pastor’s saying and took on several servant-leadership positions while in high school and even in graduate school. I purposely put myself in positions where I could be a resource to another person or where I could sow into someone else’s vision. I did a lot of volunteer work and even became a personal assistant. I took on many of these roles with a genuine desire to see another person succeed. If you think about it, my pastor’s quote can really help to combat jealousy and envy. I know it did for me. Instead of hating on those who are where I think I “should be” or envying people who have accomplished much more than me, I’ve learned to help them push their agenda and sincerely root for them. 

If you really want to succeed, find someone who has a vision that you believe in and sow into them. I’m sure that if you help someone achieve their dream, others will help you! I’m sure Lupita helped plenty of people along her journey which contributed to her recent success! In my life I’ve noticed that after all my years of helping others with their vision, it’s finally time for me to focus on my own. My servant-leadership experiences have given me more insight and guidance than any book, course or training could have! For me the #1 secret for getting ahead has been helping others make their dreams come true! 

The #1 Secret to Getting Ahead 

Share Your Wisdom. Comment Below!

What tactics did you use to “get ahead” in life?

What do you think holds most women back from “getting ahead” or pursuing their dreams?

What do you think of Lupita’s quote or my Pastor’s quote?