We’re all familiar with the struggles of curvy girls in a society that shuns too much of anything, especially too much of a body. But there’s another side of it, the light of the ‘too’ skinny girls who go through daily passive aggressive remarks about the body she lives in. The skinny girl struggle is real.

Neither situation, being a size 0 or a size 20 warrants the type of societal shaming that often goes on but the side of skinny is something rarely discussed, especially in the black community. So here at Mocha Girls Pit Stop, in order to make sure all women feel welcome, we want to start the conversation about what it’s like to be skinny shamed.

Everyone doesn’t love being skinny and you shouldn’t assume that skinny girls are happy with their size. Every person with a body has insecurities and skinny girls aren’t immune to the self conscious thoughts.

As body positive movements emerge online, it’s important for us to remember that it’s never necessary to put down skinny girls/women (who in most cases, can’t help their size) to make full-figured women feel better. Phrases like “real women have curves” are terribly against the body love we’re hoping to promote amongst us all.

One of our Mocha Girls shared her experience with getting snide comments about her small frame, “I have always found it not cool the degree to which people felt they had license to comment on my size and disappointed by the veiled hostility or tone in some of their comments.”

The Skinny Girl Struggle: 25 Things You Should Stop Saying to Skinny Girls

1.” Do you eat?”
Uhh, this is just plain rude. 

2. “You need more meat on your bones”
So basically I’m not good enough at my natural weight? Gee, how inspiring. You made me feel great!

3. “I’d love to have your problem”
Kind of like telling a homeless person you wish you didn’t have to pay rent either. You sound ridiculous.

4. “I’m scared to hug you, I feel like I might break you”
Please, don’t flatter yourself, your affection is not ultra strength, now come hug me!

5. “Skinny girls are bitches”
 Believe me, it is your comments that are making me bitchy, not my body type.

6. “You’ll gain weight after 30 or when you have kids” 
Thank you oh wise fortune teller, unfortunately your services were not requested.

7. “Why are you eating a salad? You’re already super skinny” 
Ummm, I like the taste of kale maybe?

8. “Slim jim, stick figure, sticks, bony, skinny minnie, bones, string bean, chicken legs, twig, scrawny, skeleton, toothpick, snake, stretch and anything in between…”
I’d actually prefer to be addressed by my first name, thank you.

9. “I can fit my fingers around your entire wrist”
The fact that you brought that up is, errr, weird…

10. “Real women have curves. If your thighs don’t touch, you’re not a real woman”
 If thighs are your anatomical definition of womanhood you’ve got a whole high school course of biology awaiting you my dear.

11. “You’re shaped like a little boy”
It takes a certain kind of woman to say this to another woman.

12. “Why don’t you model?”
I prefer accounting, thanks.

13. “Can I pick you up?”
Mmmm, unfortunately my human body wasn’t created to be tossed around. I enjoy standing solidly on the ground, thanks.

14. “Does being skinny run in your family?”
What? Why?

15. “You’re shaped like a white girl”
What exactly is the standard size for a black girl or white girl? Let us be beautiful. We have a healthy functioning body and that’s a lot to be grateful for.

16. “You don’t need to work out”
Working out isn’t just about body weight. Health people, health!

17. “You don’t know what it’s like to struggle with weight”

 Struggling with weight is not just limited to the high end of the scale. There are struggles for everyone who is living in a body.
18. “Why are you so skinny?”
Probably the same reason your hands have five fingers. It’s how I was created. Let it go.

19. “There’s no way you’re going to eat all that”
In which most all women would reply, “Don’t believe me just watch” in their best Bruno Mars voice.

20. “You look anorexic”
 Is mentioning a very real possibility of a health issue in ANYONE ever appropriate?

21. “Skinny girls are evil”
We aren’t evil, we’re misunderstand. We don’t think we’re all that or better than anyone else. We’re just trying to get through life and be the best we can be. Can we live?

22.” Of course you’re cold! You have no fat on you”
Umm, okkkk?

23. “You’re all skin and bones”
There are WAY more interesting body parts of a person to point out, right? Like, heart and smile perhaps?

24. “Do you shop in the children’s section?”
Just at the grocery store. I still haven’t be able to get over graham crackers.

25. “0 is not a size”
It is. It’s someone’s size and it is just as valid as a 6 or a 16. All which are perfectly fine.

Ladies, it’s simple: women are beautiful and we shouldn’t slim-shame or fat-shame anyone. We as women know how hard it is to live in this society as they continue to put pressure on us about our bodies. Let’s celebrate each other, including ourselves!

Did I miss anything? Share your thoughts below!

  • Hey lady! Thanks so much for sharing. Girl, I’m about 10 years older than you and I’m pretty much the same size I was when I was your age. haha You are perfect just the way you are and you’re right, society needs to stop shaming skinny girls. We’re all beautiful. 🙂


    Im a 16 year old Brooklyn girl I am black, tall, skinny and clumsy but this post made me smile today because all I ever hear about is curves and how I need to gain weight. Society need to stop shaming skinny girls to make thick girls feel better we all need a little acceptance

  • Aww, I feel your pain! Thank YOU for reading and taking the time to comment. I think my biggest pet peeve when it comes to the “skinny girl struggle”, is when people say, “OMG, you’re so skinny.” All hell would break loose if we uttered the words, “OMG, you’re so big.” lol

  • Thanks for writing this. As a slim girl with skinny arms and very visible collarbones, I receive snide remarks about my figure from idiots and I don’t like it.


  • Haha! Thanks for sharing sis. Some people have no idea. lol

  • Kim Kay B

    Nope. I think you got them all. LOL! This has so been my life.