momjail

One relationship that continues to test my ability to forgive is the relationship that I have with my mom. My mom has been in and out of jail since I was 8 years old. A few years ago, she was sentenced to 4 years in prison, which was the longest stint she’s ever done. For the majority of my undergraduate career and for some of the most important years of my younger sibling’s lives, my mom was locked up.

Despite being verbally and physically abused by my mom when I was younger, we have a great relationship today. Cultivating our productive mother-daughter relationship was not an overnight process. It took years, tears, work an lots of forgiveness on both ends.

It brings me great joy to share this interview with you as my mom and I discuss things we’ve never publicly addressed together.

In this interview we talk about family secrets, denial, mental health, forgiveness and my mom offers advice for mother’s who have rocky relationships with their kids.

If you aren’t familiar with the strained relationships between my mom and I, take a look at the posts below!

Must read posts about me and my mom’s journey:

Dear Mama: Standing Up to My Mom for the First Time

How to Forgive…Even When it Hurts

When Mother’s Day is Bittersweet

Nuggets of insight from Mama Lomax:

“In order for us to have a productive and effective relationship, I had to stop being in denial.”

“Sometimes in order for us to heal, we have to reveal somethings.”

“If I can’t forgive myself no one else will.”

“You can never make up for lost times, but what you can do is begin where you are and move forward and do better.”

If you know a woman who’s had a trying mother-daughter experience, please share this interview with her. My hope is to inspire other mother’s and daughter’s to rekindle their relationships and heal from old wounds.

Share Your Wisdom. Join the Conversation!

Have you experienced tension in your mother-daughter relationship? How did you deal with it? If you took anything away from this interview feel free to share your feedback below. 

  • Thank you for reading Tiffany! Girl it’s crazy how powerful generational cycles are. I’m sorry to hear that you had some of the same painful experiences that I had. I’ll tell you, before my mom took responsibility I forgave her and made a decision to “be ok” and move on gracefully. I’m happy that her and I have a great relationship today. There’s hope. Don’t give up mama. Just because we were victims doesn’t mean we have to have a victim mentality. You get whatever therapy you might be in need of and take care of your babies and be a better example for them. 🙂 You got this <3

  • Tiffany Pinkyest Stovall

    Tell Auntie i said Hi ?

  • Tiffany Pinkyest Stovall

    I just really wanna say its so wonderful to get to see real women be women i am 29 an still have a in denial relationship with my mother an with your mother i truly believe her up bringing effected her up bringing with her children cause i was raised in my teen years by her brother your uncle an things he would do as well threw objects at me I’ve been choked before an more an i was told to be greatful for his presence an i ended up in a abusive marriage cause of all the abuse from him my father an so forth i ended up being greatful cause they still was there their so called presence an i realized its nothing wrong with letting go if its coursing you harm my up bringing could’ve had me way off but like you said my spiritual dedication keeps me above water an talking an sharing an conforming the problems an issues is a very wonderful form of soul cleansing ?

  • Sakinah Parks

    This was a great interview very inspiring I’m very proud of you for standing up and for Mama Lomax for realizing her mistakes and knowing that there is a greater path for you both. Thank you for sharing with us. I hope others will be inspired by it. I know I was!

  • Samantha Price

    AMAZING…that was great i learned so much about my self that i never even knew or didnt wanna know.Thank you ladies so much for sharing your story and instantly changing my life.